Couples therapy in New Canaan, CT
Keep having the same argument?
I help couples understand why they keep having the same argument and find better ways to talk, listen, and reconnect.
A chance to ask questions and see whether we’re a good fit. No obligation to book a therapy session.
In person in New Canaan · Online across Connecticut and New York
Couples sessions: $300 for 50 minutes · Out-of-network provider
When the conversation changes, but the argument stays the same
You might still care deeply about each other, but find that the same conversations end in criticism, defensiveness or silence.
Sometimes it starts with money, parenting or who’s doing more at home. Sometimes it’s about how little time you have for each other. Before long, you’re back in a familiar place: one of you feels unheard, the other feels criticized, and neither of you knows how to move forward.
You may recognize some of this:
You revisit the same disagreement without feeling that anything gets resolved.
One of you wants to talk while the other pulls away.
You manage everyday life together but feel distant as partners.
Work, parenting or family pressures leave little room for your relationship.
Trust has been damaged, or you’re unsure what the future holds.
You don’t need a perfectly worded explanation before reaching out. We can start with what feels difficult right now.
Understand the pattern. Practice a different response.
In our work together, we look at what happens between you when things become difficult. What sets the argument in motion? What does each of you hear? What are you trying to say that isn’t getting through?
Notice the cycle
Recognize the moments when a conversation starts to unravel, and the reactions that keep it going.
Say what matters
Work on expressing concerns and needs more clearly, and hearing your partner without immediately preparing a defense.
Make room for a next step
Explore what rebuilding connection, addressing damaged trust or making a difficult decision would involve for your relationship.
The aim is to develop understanding and ways of relating that you can use outside the therapy room. We’ll shape the work around your circumstances and goals.
MSW, New York University · Connecticut LCSW #011952 · New York LCSW #092500
Meet Jon Abelack, LCSW
A direct, thoughtful approach to working with both of you
I’m Jon Abelack, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker based in New Canaan. I work with individuals and couples in person and online across Connecticut and New York.
Before becoming a therapist, I spent more than 20 years in sales and marketing roles in financial services. That background informs my understanding of the pressure a demanding career can bring into a relationship.
My couples work draws on approaches including Relational Life Therapy and Emotionally Focused Therapy. In practice, that means paying attention to the patterns between you and your partner, being honest about what I notice and helping you explore different ways to respond.
I want to understand both of your experiences. The work includes looking honestly at how each of you participates in the relationship and what change might ask of you.
Start with a conversation. Decide from there.
01
A free 15-minute conversation
Tell me briefly what’s bringing you here, ask about my approach and discuss practical questions such as fees, availability and meeting online or in person. We’ll consider whether working together makes sense.
02
An initial couples session
If we decide to begin, I’ll spend time understanding your relationship, the difficulties you’re experiencing and what each of you hopes will change.
03
Ongoing work with a clear focus
We’ll agree on the areas to work on and revisit how things are going. Sessions are usually weekly. Depending on your needs, I may suggest things to notice, reflect on or practice between appointments.
No obligation to continue after the introductory conversation.
Fees & location
The practical details, upfront
Couples therapy: $300 per 50-minute session
I’m an out-of-network provider. I provide a monthly superbill that you can submit to your insurer for possible reimbursement. Coverage varies, so check directly with your insurance company about your benefits.
In person
180 Bridle Path Lane
New Canaan, CT 06840
Online
Sessions for clients located in Connecticut or New York.
Getting started
The initial 15-minute conversation is free. We can discuss current availability and whether online or in-person appointments would suit you.
Frequently asked questions
Questions you might have before reaching out
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No. Couples therapy can be a place to work on your relationship whether you’re dating, engaged, married or in a long-term partnership.
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You can still reach out for a conversation. Tell me where things stand, and we can discuss what kind of support might be appropriate.
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No. I'm on the side of your relationship. I'll hold you both accountable, stay on both of your sides, and help you move from fighting each other to working together.
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You can bring that uncertainty into the conversation. We can discuss whether my approach is suitable for helping you explore your concerns and next steps.
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There isn’t one timetable for every relationship. It depends on what you’re working through and your circumstances. We’ll discuss the focus of the work and review progress together.
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Yes. I offer online sessions for clients located in Connecticut and New York, as well as in-person sessions at my New Canaan office.
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I’m an out-of-network provider. Couples sessions are $300 for 50 minutes, and I provide a monthly superbill for possible reimbursement. Your insurer can confirm your coverage.
You don’t have to work out the next step on your own.
If you recognize your relationship here, a free 15-minute conversation is a place to start. Tell me a little about what’s happening, ask your questions and see whether working together feels right.